Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Woof Woof?

"If it looks like a dog, barks like a dog, it is a dog."

That line, of course, was among the brilliant musings Mike Milbury offered hockey fans in NBC's national telecast of the Caps/Flyers game on Sunday in description of Alex Ovechkin's play (just four days, I'd note, after saying that AO had "taken it to another level" and calling the Caps' superstar "as electrifying a player as [he'd] seen.").

Anyway, since we're talking pooches, let's talk Viktor Kozlov, shall we? Which of these stats is less impressive:
  • In twelve full seasons in the NHL, Kozlov has played 830 regular season games and just 17 playoff games and has never played past the first round (recall, too, that he was a healthy scratch during the playoffs for the Devils in both 2004 and 2006).
  • In his 17 career playoff games, Kozlov has yet to score a goal and has totalled all of three assists and a minus-ten rating.
I'd say the latter is less impressive, as it is a wholly individual stat, though his teams' failures to get to the playoffs and/or do anything once there does say something about a guy who has been a top-six forward for the better part of his career (and it's not a good something).

Kozlov's career playoff stats sure do look like a dog, don't they?

But that was then and this is now... and now ain't much better. Through three games so far (and on a line with the best player in the world), Kozlov has no points, a minus-three rating, five shots on goal, four giveaways and one takeaway. And from the "you know it's a bad sign when..." file, he has as many hits as John Erskine.

Kozlov's performance in these playoffs thus far sure have barked like a dog, no?

So if it looks like a dog and barks like a dog...


Anonymous said...

But then again, no one thought the Caps were going to the conference final, did we?

3 Grumpy Caps fans said...

Kozlov is worthless. Totally worthless. But then, he's never attempted to show he's anything else. He's like Dainius Zubrus, except he doesn't try. Kozlov has one gear -- slow, and never even tries to shift out of it. He lumbers around out there and circles back and forth between the top of the circles and the corner. Note that he never actually goes INTO the corner. He avoids corners like the plague. Then he puts one hand on the stick ala Zubrus, and waits for someone to come take the puck away from him. Someone on the other team. He's 6'4" and plays like he's 5'4". He absolutely refuses to hit fact, he refuses to do ANYTHING that might endanger him physically. Can anyone tell me the last time they saw Kozlov go down to block a shot. Exactly. But the Caps knew that when they signed him. I think he sucks, but I don't blame him for that. He's never played any other way. Weak, slow, and afraid, that's Kozlov. But hey, he's Russian and he has tons of skill. And he's great on penalty shots, since you don't need to be brave, strong, or fast to score on those. So we've got that going for us. Which is nice.

JP said...

But how do you really feel? :)