Appeasing J.R.

Rink fave Jeremy Roenick is running his mouth for a change, this time complaining that his new team (the Phoenix Coyotes for those who care) won't be on national broadcast television in the U.S. this coming season (they will be on OLN Versus one time).

Despite the fact that the 'Yotes had a losing record, missed the playoffs and didn't have a single 70-point scorer a season ago, by not showing a single one of their games on NBC, the League and/or NBC are "incredibly either disrespectful to Wayne [Gretzky - duh] or disrespectful to the city of Phoenix," according to J.R. He continues:

"Yeah, Phoenix is not a big city, but we do have some big-name players on our team such as Jovanovski and Owen Nolan, myself, Shane Doan, and an up-and-comer like (Ladislav) Nagy."

Forgiving for a moment J.R.'s ignorance (Phoenix is actually the sixth largest city in the U.S.) and his over-inflated ego (his point totals since 2000-01? 76, 67, 59, 47 and 22 - look out below!), we at The Rink would like nothing more than to make Jeremy happy. So here - on the World Wide Web for all to see - is a Phoenix Coyotes highlight:



xoxoxo,

Japers' Rink

Finnish? These Guys Haven't Even Started

Hockey's Future has put together a list of the Top 30 Drafted Finnish Prospects and two Caps make the list (the number in parentheses indicates the players rank on last year's list):

14. (15) Sami Lepistö, D - Washington
Age: 21
Team in 2006-07: Jokerit (FIN)

Lepistö’s 2005-06 season came close to ruin while playing on a dysfunctional team. Fortunately, he managed to develop even amidst the chaos of the Jokerit squad. The team was preparing to lose its top defenseman to Washington, but the Capitals didn’t feel the need to rush their prospect and so Lepistö will stay in Finland for another year. While it may seem that new AHL scenery would be the best for a defenseman who needs to solidify his defensive game, the tutelage of Doug Shedden that proved good for young talent in the IFK organization last year, is a good option too.

In the long run, Lepistö has shown development in his defensive game as well as his abilities of a power play quarterback and puck-carrying defenseman each. He showed outstanding flashes of his ability on the power play in Euro Hockey Tour games in 2005 and is just baby steps away from becoming a top quarterback in all of Europe. Over the past season, Lepistö has also developed when it comes to moving the puck from the own end into the offensive zone, a skill ever so important in the new NHL. Whether his overall play is good enough to make him a specialist player or a genuinely valuable defenseman remains to be seen.

...

23. (NR) Oskar Osala, LW - Washington
Age: 18
Team in 2006-07: Mississauga Ice Dogs (OHL)

At age 16, Osala was already 6’3 and weighed well over 200 pounds, which made it easy for him to stand out among his peers. He didn’t end up being only an early bloomer, as he maintained a status as a top 100 prospect in his draft class. Osala left for Mississauga for his draft year, eager to play the physical hockey of the Ontario Hockey League. He had a rough start, though, and not until the middle of the season did he start playing up to his potential.

If Osala can pick up where he left in the upcoming season, he has a chance to enjoy a better season than any other Finn in the CHL in recent memory. Still, perhaps the more interesting question is where he will spend his 2007-08 season. A three-year OHL career could be best for him, but his late 1987 birthdate complicates his junior status some. In any case, the Capitals need not worry about their prospect’s future, as it seems bright for the big and talented forward.

And in case you were wondering where exactly these chaps are from...

Who's Hockey's Only "True" Franchise Player?

Hint: his initials are A.O.

How God Sees The Caps

Click on image to enlarge

Where In The World Are The Caps?

A post over at Mirtle's site and a healthy dose of boredom have led to an evening of plotting Caps' players and prospects on Google Earth. While I'm new to the application, I think the results still turned out pretty well.

To begin with, I plotted the players to the city in which they were born, according to WashingtonCaps.com (where I also got most of the pictures, so thanks to them). I weighted the fonts for the players to indicate their likely level of hockey for this coming year (i.e. the NHLers have their names the largest, the taxi squad next and everyone else has the smallest font). Anyway, on to the pictures - as always, click on 'em to enlarge 'em.

First, the North American NHLers and 'tweeners (you can see pics of the other players, but need a closer-in screen cap to read their names - more on that later):No surprise that most of these guys live within about a Tiger Woods 3-wood of the border, and we all know how much GMGM loves his Western Canadian guys. Speaking of the Western Canadians, let's zoom in on that part of the country, shall we?Here, for the first time, we can see the AHLers and other prospects. Of the 11 players from Alberta and British Columbia, seven are blueliners. Interesting.

Swing back east and we see a bunch of Quebecers and Toronto-area guys, a handful of New Englanders and a couple of pockets of Midwesterners:No real surprises on this map, other than perhaps Donald Brashear being a Hoosier. Now to cross the pond...The Caps don't have too many Europeans at the NHL level (though the four very well could be the team's top four scorers this coming season), but they've got plenty of prospects, as the next two maps (of Eastern Europe and Scandanavia) show. By the way, Alexander Semin is from wa-a-ay the hell out there, isn't he?Finally, my favorite map of all, depicting the NHLer who has a continent to himself - Olie Kolzig:
So there you have it - a little globetrotting with the Caps courtesy of the fine folks at Google and Japers' Rink. Now if the team can just acquire this guy, I can add a new map next time 'round...

Is It An Omen?

To me, this says that the Red Wings will beat the Sharks in the Western Conference Finals and sweep the Penguins in the Stanley Cup Finals.

[Thanks to Spe for the link.]

Which NHLer Are You?

Have you ever wondered which NHL player your day-to-day life most resembles? Of course not. Nevertheless, this 10-question test (you don't even have to answer all of them) will provide context to your neuroses in a way that would make Jung cry tears of joy. It may just change your life.

And yes, it's a shameless rip off of this test which I found yesterday courtesy of Deadspin. What can I say - I'm a regular Tom Layberger.

UPDATE: Which Washington Capital are you?

Remember When ESPN Cared About Hockey? Me Neither.

In an article on Evgeni Malkin, ESPN offered this gem (underline added):

Hopefully Alex can add a Vezina Trophy this year as the NHL's best defenseman.

If You Don't Have Something Nice To Say...

Always Mr. Optimism (or is that Mr. Sarcasm?), San Jose bench boss Ron Wilson on his team's latest free agent acquisition, former Capital (it's nice to be able to say that) Mathieu Biron (file photo):

He's a player that's certainly at an interesting age. Sometimes players are late bloomers -- especially big players.

Uh-huh. Not "He's got a big shot from the point," or "He can really hit," but rather "He's 26 and sometimes tall players stink out loud until they're 26." Crazy Ron knows.

• Over/under on how many regular season games Biron plays for the Sharks this year: 26
• Over/under on his plus/minus: -7
  
• Over/under on how many pounds of monkey crap Biron is in a five-pound bag: 8
  

From Le Department Promotionale

Always thinking about how to increase ticket sales for NHL games, I had a brilliant idea for a promotional giveaway for the Canadiens to use. Now, I know that the Habs sell out every game, so maybe this promotion can be used by other teams when the Habs are in town. For instance, how many people are going to go to the Verizon Center on Wednesday, December 27 to see the Caps host the Canadiens? Probably around 12,000. But employ this giveaway and the place will be packed to the rafters.

Ladies and gentlemen, I give to you Sheldon Souray Jersey Night:

This one's free, NHL. From here on out, I'll be billing you.

Cinco de Japers

Alright, Casonblog and Predsguy both tagged me, so here are my five things:

1. I have every Rush album through "Roll The Bones" on CD. Now I find them unlistenable. I'm not sure why, but at some point in my late teens I found the combination of obnoxiously shrill vocals, sci-fi-inspired lyrics and virtuoso Canadian musicianship appealing. Almost miraculously (and certainly surprisingly), I had a girlfriend at the time.

2. I've never played ice hockey in my life. Not once. I've skated some, played a fair amount of roller hockey and damn near enough Sega/PS/PS2 hockey to make my eyes bleed, but have never once held a hockey stick in my hands on the ice. Then again, there were guys playing for the Caps last year with little more experience (I'm looking at you, Lurch), so I don't feel so bad.

3. I once - once - Welshed on a bet (apologies to Taffy and other Welshmen I may offend with that idiom). Well, I guess I haven't technically Welshed yet, as there was no specified period of performance during which I had to pay up. And it wasn't even technically a bet either, as there was no consideration coming the other way even if I was right. But I lost and have yet to uphold my end of the bargain. Follow me back to the year 2000...

It was a time of innocence and national prosperity (both of which would be short-lived). While nine unelected lawyers were busy deciding who the next leader of the free world would be, I was busy trying to win my fantasy hockey league and one of my fellow owners who was known for slightly over-valuing his players was busy touting the greatness that was Robert Lang. Lang started the season like a house afire, and the unnamed owner was letting us all know about it. I'd had enough and boldly proclaimed then and there that "if Robert Lang score[d] 80 points [that] season, I'[d] get his face tatooed on my ass." Well, Lang ended up with exactly 80 points and I ended up with egg on my face (but no tat on my ass). One of these days I may pay up. But if I do and if I show it around, are there really any winners?

4. The last four digits of my cell phone number are 5247. Alpha-numerically, that spells Jagr. What can I say, I was young and optimistic and by the time he dashed my hopes, too many people had the number to change it. Jagr. Jerk.

5. Not to end on a sad note, but I was in New York City for a long weekend in early September, 2001. A buddy and I were in town to see Michael Jackson at MSG (Jesus, Rush and Michael Jackson in one post - this is more embarassing than I'd thought it would be) on that Monday night, staying with a buddy in mid-town and leaving early the next morning to work the second half of the day back at the Capitol in D.C. Anyway, we got up Tuesday morning, got our acts together and split town, through the Lincoln tunnel a bit before eight o'clock and took in that beautiful view of Manhattan, at which point I turned to my buddy and said, "Say goodbye to the New York skyline, Andy." That was September 11, and the rest is obviously history and the "I'll always remember where I was when..." moment of my generation.

OK, I'm done. I'm gonna keep it local and tag Off Wing Opinion, DC SportsChick, Mr. Irrelevant, Caps Nut and Puckhead's Thoughts.

Caps Get New Logo

Kudos to Netsrak and his always-brilliant photoshopping and sense of humor.

UPDATE: For the comedically-challenged, the above is a joke based on this.

Caps Sign Taticek, Fill Enigmatic-Czech-Named-Petr Void

In case you'd forgotten the Petr Sykora experiment ("It took the Capitals three years to get Petr Sykora to come to the NHL, and it took the player less than three months to decide it wasn't for him."), here's Version 2.0, courtesy some goofy Czech webiste:

Petr Tatíček zůstane v zámoří, dohodl se na dvoucestné smlouvě s Washingtonem

Loose translation: "Petr Taticek, who should probably be off herding goats in Moravia, has signed with the Caps" (apologies - my Czech is a little rusty).

You might recall Taticek as a Florida Panther farmhand. More likely you don't recall him at all. In any event, here's what TSN has to say about him:

Assets: Has tremendous playmaking skills and is comfortable in all three zones of the ice. Is developing into a better-than-average offensive center.

Flaws: Must add even more bulk to his 6-3 frame and get a lot stronger in order to play regularly in the NHL.

Career potential: Second line center.

Pretty sweet. Hockey's Future is less optimistic, grading him a 5.0 D (5.0 indicating that his talent tops out at fourth line forward, D indicating that he's "unlikely to reach [that] potential"). In other words, don't think that this guy is going to step in and be the number two center the team's been looking for. But as a roll of the dice? Probably not a bad move, especially when you read that one line in the HF analysis:

Taticek thrives when playing with skilled wingers, because of his stick-handling ability and hockey sense.

An interesting side note: the Caps now have six - count 'em, six - players on their roster who were drafted in the first round in 2002. Unfortunately, none of them is named Nash or Lehtonen, Pitkanen or Ward.

Update: Here's an HF Panthers board thread from when Taticek was traded for Ric Jackman this past season. And here's one from the Pens side.